


forever and a day

by apeunde



Category: VIXX
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-01
Updated: 2016-09-01
Packaged: 2018-08-10 19:55:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7859008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apeunde/pseuds/apeunde
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sanghyuk knows that falling for both of his mentors is a silly, childish crush that he should have quit long ago. But as him and Taekwoon are sent to war, Hakyeon's bundled up emotions make Sanghyuk realize that maybe, he should trust his heart more than his mind.</p><p> </p><p>“But eyes are blind. You have to look with the heart.” - Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince.</p>
            </blockquote>





	forever and a day

“We’re almost there!” Hakyeon exclaims from the front, and it makes Taekwoon lift his head a little. They’ve been journeying back from their mission for a couple of days now. Taekwoon knows that both of their bodies are more than apt to withstand journeys far longer than the one they’ve been on for the past two weeks, but he can’t help but feel restless with the need of returning to his bed in the guild’s living chambers, and sleep.

“Come on, Taekwoon, don’t be so slow,” Hakyeon chuckles as they wind around the last of the trees growing into a little forest along the path into the mountains.

The sun almost blinds Taekwoon as he blinks a couple of times to adjust to being out in the open again, the shade of the trees having shielded him from the brightness of the day. Bringing one of his hands up to cover his eyes from the rays of the sun, he follows Hakyeon’s outstretched hand, pointed at the town.

It’s always a sight, seeing Brelgar from a couple of miles away — the big four edged square in the centre of the city clearly visible from the slopes of the mountains, carving the town into geometrical shapes with smaller, leaner streets zigzagging in between the living parts of the city. The four main streets, heading north, east, south and west before they meet with the gates of the city’s ramparts are full, Taekwoon can tell even from this distance. It makes him feel awake, and his eyes wander over along the eastern parts of the city, along the houses until they set on the pointy, grand rooftop of the Astra Lumen guild headquarters.

Taekwoon takes a side glance at Hakyeon, who’s watching the city with a longing look in his eyes. He knows Hakyeon always misses home most. It’s not something the mage would ever say out loud, but Taekwoon has been partnering with him for long enough to know. When it comes to Hakyeon, there are some things that he doesn’t needs words for to understand.

“Let’s move,” Taekwoon says with a little jump to his step; he’s excited to set foot into the guild’s headquarters, see everyone again after another successful mission. Maybe he’d even let Sanghyuk talk him into drinking a beer or two — it feels like an eternity since he’s had the time to just relax. He can hear Hakyeon chase after him, shooting him a grin when he falls into step beside him.

It feels good to be back home.

 

***

 

“Oi, Taekwoon!” comes the call the moment they walk in through the front doors of the guild. It catches them both off guard, and before Taekwoon knows it all he can see is a ball of black hair obscuring his vision as Sanghyuk ignores all meaning of personal space. Taekwoon catches Hakyeon’s bemused eyes and is fast to push the younger away, despite being happy to see the kid, too. Hugging never really was his style.

“Hey Sanghyuk,” he replies with a little smile, one of his hands coming up to ruffle through the apprentice healer’s hair. He feels a little sorry that he’s been so busy, having to cancel most of their lessons during the past couple of months; but he knows that Sanghyuk has been far from lazing around. There’s always something to do at the guild, and due to Sanghyuk’s tall and strong build as well as his powers, Taekwoon is sure he’s been asked to help out with all different kinds of tasks.

“Don’t I get a hello, too?” Hakyeon pouts, arms crossed over his chest. It makes Taekwoon smile, a small fleeting one that he tries not to show; but Sanghyuk is far less subtle with his words.

“And you are?” Sanghyuk teases, the grin plastered on his face wide and mischievous. Hakyeon fakes a gasp, giving Sanghyuk his best scrunched up and disapproving look.

“You need to learn manners. Has Taekwoon been teaching you so little?” Hakyeon shakes his head in disbelief. 

Taekwoon leaves the two of them to their quarrel, walking further down the hall to one of the tables in the adjoint guild tavern. The room is still quite empty as it’s still barely after lunch time. There are a few fellow members scattered around the tables, some of them for a late lunch, others just to chat. Taekwoon usually doesn’t like staying in the common room of the tavern, the noise and the chatter too loud for him. But today, it seems like most of the mages are out on missions, and Taekwoon finds it a lot more comfortable.

“Hey, Taekwoon,” the waitress nods at him with a smile that Taekwoon returns. “Haven’t seen you and Hakyeon around for a while. Had a long trip?”

“Quite,” Taekwoon answers as he walks up to the counter; he’s always liked Eunji. She’s one of the people that he doesn’t feel completely exhausted by, being mostly calm and a very good listener, although when they’re talking, it’s Eunji that talks the most out of the two of them. There isn’t one member of the guild Taekwoon absolutely can’t stand, something that he’s been surprised by a couple of times, but it doesn’t mean that the others can’t be quite tiring.

“Do you want me to fetch you some lunch? I think there are still a couple of servings left,” she offers, and Taekwoon nods with a smile.

“Could you make that two? I’m sure Hakyeon will want some as well.”

“Alright, coming right up!” she says as she disappears into the back of the kitchen.

Taekwoon takes a seat at one of the tables, putting his gear down on the floor next to him. It’s only now that he’s finally sitting down that he feels the soreness of his muscles, and the exhaustion of the trip washing over him. Doing missions with Hakyeon is like nothing Taekwoon had ever imagined it to be. Upon entering Astra Lumen, Taekwoon had heard a lot of gossip about Hakyeon. Both famous and infamous for his magic, there was never a partner that lasted more than two missions. Being an elemental mage in itself is already synonym with being in possession of very high magic, but Hakyeon has more than just that. Taekwoon isn’t sure how many mages can control all four main elements, but in the — maybe — a handful littered all across the empire, Hakyeon is one of the youngest and most promising ones.

Taekwoon has seen the destructive power of Hakyeon’s magic often enough, and it never fails to amaze him how well controlled it is. He’s heard a lot about the problems of controlling the four elements in one magical body — the close tie to the mage’s emotions needing special training to stabilise the connection. It’s one of the reasons why, after joining the guild, it had fallen upon Taekwoon to partner up with Hakyeon; as a strong and earth bound healer, his magic is perfectly fitted to heal Hakyeon and everyone around in the matter of minutes, in case his control over his magic falters. 

At the beginning, Taekwoon had felt burdened by the prospect of working together with a powerful mage like Hakyeon. He had only heard about the bad parts, about the number of partners quitting after a month or two and the frustration Hakyeon let out far too often on people that didn’t do anything wrong. But after the first few weeks, Taekwoon had realised just how wrong his assumptions were — and he realised that Hakyeon had been burdened by it all just as much as anybody else. He was only a young man, after all, and Taekwoon understood that his power must have been hard to get accustomed to. In the end, Taekwoon had worried over nothing; the more missions they succeeded in, the clearer it became that their teamwork was unrivalled by any partnership in the guild. It hadn’t taken them long to be able to work together in sync, and Taekwoon’s abilities never failed to save them both whenever Hakyeon performed magic just a little over his control. 

Over the past two years, their teamwork hasn’t changed much, Taekwoon thinks. It makes a smile ride up his face as Eunji comes back with two bowls of hot steaming soup, and when he looks up he is startled to find Hakyeon sitting right opposite of him, staring.

“What were you thinking about? You had a stupid grin on your face the whole time.” Hakyeon asks with a twinkle in his eyes, and Taekwoon feels a dust of pink color his cheeks.

“Nothing much,” he replies evasively, picking up his spoon to stir the soup, taking a deep breath to smell the delicious scent. After two weeks of bread and mostly dry, pickled meat, his stomach churned at the taste of the soup. Hakyeon mirrors his movements, not pursuing the teasing further.

“We need to go up to the master’s study after this, hand in our report,” he grimaces, and Taekwoon simply nods. It’s always the most boring part of missions, giving report of any encounters and hurdles along the way of the journey, but Taekwoon has come to accept that everything must be documented, just in case.

“By the way,” Hakyeon starts, looking around them, leaning a little closer to Taekwoon, “have you heard about Lightning Floralis?” he almost whispers, eyebrows creased in the middle of his forehead. The name of their allied guild makes Taekwoon stop in his tracks, the spoonful of soup stopping in the middle of the air.

“No, what’s wrong?” he asks, a little worried. He’s heard about their engagement on the battlefield on the eastern borders, but he didn’t linger much on it as they had to depart for their mission back then. War has always been something that troubles Taekwoon, and he tries not to think about it if he can help it.

“Sanghyuk told me that there were reports of casualties,” Hakyeon says, voice low, as if he doesn’t really want to believe it. “Apparently, the Asgar Kingdom has engaged troops of mercenary mages to fight against our Empire’s guilds.”

The words make Taekwoon raise his eyebrows is shock. It’s not uncommon for mages to offer their services for money, it’s the trade that comes with every mages guild. But fighting a war for money was something most mages didn’t get involved in, not if no written allegiance bound them to that duty. In the Empire, only the top guilds had to sign such contracts, and until now, Astra Lumen had not been revalued due to delay in the procedures, something Taekwoon hoped could be delayed even longer. 

“But that’s— how did they even find such a number of uncontracted mages?” Taekwoon replies, confused. He doesn’t really feel like eating anymore, the soup in front of him having lost its taste. Hakyeon shrugs, finishing up his bowl.

“That’s the question, isn’t it?” he says before his eyes wander down to Taekwoon’s serving. “Are you gonna finish that?”

Without a word Taekwoon pushes the bowl to Hakyeon, who gives him a delighted smile. It makes Taekwoon scoff. “Are you ever gonna stop eating?”

Hakyeon gives Taekwoon a scandalised look. “I need to eat to maintain my magical energy. If I don’t it’d dry me up, you know that.” he says, gulping down the remnants of the soup in a couple of spoonfuls.

“If only,” Taekwoon mutters under his breath, pointedly loud enough for Hakyeon to hear.

“Hey!” the elemental mage exclaims, a pout on his lips. “I heard that.”

Hakyeon looks like he’s about to give Taekwoon a piece of his mind when suddenly they’re interrupted by a mage with soft looking eyes and brown, slightly curly hair framing his face. Taekwoon looks up in surprise — he hasn’t seen the older mage for a couple of months now.

“Jinki! I didn’t know you were back in town,” Hakyeon exclaims before Jinki can even open his mouth. The older mage looks a little taken aback, but the soft smile that’s spreading on his lips is warm and nice. Taekwoon looks at him curiously. They weren’t expecting him back from his mission for another three weeks.

“Yeah, well… things got taken care of faster than I expected,” Jinki grins as he leans on their table, eyeing the two of them. “How about your mission? Everything went smoothly?” Hakyeon gives him a grimace at that, sending Taekwoon a teasing look.

“Everything but Taekwoon’s snores in the middle of the night,” Hakyeon chuckles, almost earning himself a punch in the face if his reflexes weren’t so fast. Taekwoon glares at him and at Jinki, who’s laughing wholeheartedly at his side.

“Well, if that was your biggest concern, I’d say you did pretty well,” Jinki smiles, and Taekwoon huffs a little. Of course Hakyeon wouldn’t mention how he had four degree burns on his arms from an overuse of power and the sudden lack of control over his flames; thanks to Taekwoon, you couldn’t tell the scars from his skin, and it’s not something Hakyeon would like to share. But still, saying that things had gone smoothly was a little bit of an overstatement.

“Listen,” Jinki says then, and both Hakyeon and Taekwoon perk up at the low volume his voice suddenly dropped to. “You two need to go up to the master’s office right away. He knows you’re back already, and he asked me to see if I could fetch you before everyone else drags you into some celebration.”

Hakyeon and Taekwoon share a surprised look. It’s not unusual for the master to call in mages, but this shortly after a mission he usually lets them unwind first. Taekwoon can see the worry in the way Hakyeon’s eyebrows are drawing together, and he turns back to look at Jinki with questions in his eyes.

“Is everything alright?” Taekwoon asks, voice as low as Jinki’s to keep prying ears at bay. The look on Jinki’s face seems sullen, and he lets out a sigh.

“Well, nothing’s really bad, not here,” Jinki starts, rubbing one of his hands along his chin. Taekwoon notices that he’s still wearing his armour, and the thought leaves a bitter feeling on his tongue. “But we’ve heard from a couple of sources that Lightning Floralis have been loosing mages at the front, and as allies it leaves us with the pressure to act.” The words hang in silence between them for a while; none of them is quite sure what to say.

“Is that why you’re all geared up?” Hakyeon asks slowly then, and Taekwoon isn’t surprised that he’s noticed Jinki’s attire, too. “Are you going to join their forces in the war?”

Jinki gives them a tired smile, but to Taekwoon it looks a lot more like a defeated grimace. “Partly. I have an intel mission to take care of first, but after that is done I’m expected to join their offensive ranks. Being one of the veteran mages of the guild, the master thought I’d be the most experienced for such a task.”

Taekwoon’s mouth dries up at the thought of someone as gentle as Jinki joining the war in  
the east. It feels wrong, but being one of the few healers, he’s seen Jinki in action for a mission or two, and he knows that the master choses wisely. Jinki is not only experienced, but his magnetic magic is a very powerful weapon, especially when it’s as perfected as Jinki’s is. Taekwoon thinks he really wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of one of Jinki’s spells — most of the time, they end up even more ferocious than Hakyeon’s.

“Do you think that’s why he wants to talk to us? To send us there, too?” Hakyeon asks then, eyes worried as he looks at Taekwoon. Jinki shrugs, but the look he gives Hakyeon is not very encouraging.

“I’d be prepared for the worst, if I were you. There aren’t many mages in the empire as powerful as you, Hakyeon. It’s a wonder they haven’t requested you yet.”

Jinki gives them both one last pointed look before he stands straight and leaves with a wave. There’s silence between them, none of them knowing exactly what to say. Taekwoon glances at Hakyeon, and he can see him looking down at the wooden table with his lower lip worried between his teeth. He almost wants to reach over and hug him, but he keeps the urge to himself.

“Let’s go, then,” Taekwoon says as he stands up, taking both of their now empty bowls to leave them for Eunji on the counter. “No need to mull over something that hasn’t been confirmed yet. And even if you would have to go,” Taekwoon stops for a moment, the thought of Hakyeon having to fight at the front settling in his mind, “even if they’d send you, I’d come with you, okay?” Taekwoon tries to give Hakyeon an uplifting smile, and there’s relief washing over him when Hakyeon returns it.

“With you as my healer I’d probably be dead in a couple of hours,” Hakyeon jokes, but Taekwoon senses that it’s not as light hearted as he usually is. Still, they both know that Hakyeon would trust no one else with his life more than Taekwoon, and it’s enough for Taekwoon to feel just a little better.

 

***

 

Upon entering the master’s study, the first thing Taekwoon notices are the deep creases lining their master’s forehead. It makes him look older than right before they left for their mission, and it makes a feeling of worry settle in Taekwoon’s stomach. Taekwoon had tried not to let Jinki’s words sink in too much, but as Hakyeon and him speak their greetings, all he can concentrate on is the tension hanging in the air.

“How was your mission?” their master asks softly, and it sounds tired and heavy. Hakyeon gives Taekwoon a glance before reporting the happenings to him. 

“It all went smoothly, sir. We found the bandits before they attacked another town on the northern slopes of the Talar mountains. They were well organized for the size of their group — we suspect that there might be an underground leader rallying the stray bandit groups in the area. We’ve heard there has been another attack further west, too.” Hakyeon says matter of factly. It’s disconcerting news, the Empire having to deal with inside trouble while war is raging on its eastern borders, but Taekwoon notices that their master doesn’t seem to pay much attention to Hakyeon’s words. 

“I see. We’ll need to figure out where they’re sent from, and find out the source of their alliance,” their master says with a sigh, but Taekwoon feels that his concern lies somewhere else. His eyes wander to Taekwoon, who keeps his gaze fixed on the older man. “Have their been any disturbances?”

Taekwoon knows the question was coming, but he still doesn’t like hearing it much. It’s been almost a year since Hakyeon’s last big incident of control over his magic, but the master still makes sure Taekwoon doesn’t hide even the smallest of slip ups from him. It makes Taekwoon feel like he’s turning on Hakyeon, albeit he knows it’s not meant to do him any harm; the master has always been very protective of Hakyeon, and Taekwoon knows it’s all a measure of helping him in the long run.

“Only a few burns, sir. His flames’ intensity was a little too strong to cool down fast enough after the attack.” Taekwoon says quietly, and he feels a lump sinking in his chest speaking of Hakyeon as if he wasn’t standing right next to him. “It wasn’t a big issue.”

“That's good to hear,” the master says, and there's a sigh following his words as his eyes settle on the both of them. Hakyeon gives Taekwoon a glance, one that worries Taekwoon as much as the thoughtful and exhausted pair of eyes set upon them. 

After a moment passing, at last, their master spoke. 

“You've heard of the situation on the borders already, I presume?” The eyes set on the team didn't expect an answer, so much Taekwoon is sure of. But still, he hears Hakyeon’s voice fill the space between them.

“Yes, sir. Jinki filled us in.”

Their master nods, contemplating Hakyeon’s words. There is something about the whole conversation that makes Taekwoon feel uneasiness settle in his stomach.

The master’s next words are plain, and they're something both of them have been expecting. 

“We need to act.” Another sigh escapes the elder’s lips, as if the decision is one of the hardest he's had to deal with. “We cannot defy our alliance, no matter if the Council has requested us yet, or not. We have our honor, too.”

Taekwoon nods; an alliance between guilds is not to be taken lightly, even if no alliance with the Empire has been finalized. They have a duty, and yet Taekwoon feels fear settle in his throat.

“I have decided to send a handful of mages in due time,” the master continues, “but they are in acute need of healers.” His eyes land on Taekwoon, as well as Hakyeon’s own, his lips pressed into a thin line. “You know what this means?” their master asks Taekwoon directly.

Taekwoon knows. He realizes he's the only smart choice they have, and it's only logical. If he can keep the most selfdestructive mage in the guild from hurting himself, he can keep anybody away from deadly harm. It doesn't make the task any easier to accept, though.

“I… understand, sir.” Taekwoon says softly, and he can feel Hakyeon's gaze on him from his side. He reaches for his hand, giving it a little squeeze. “When do I leave?”

“Tomorrow at dawn.” There’s a pause, and Taekwoon can feel Hakyeon fidget next to him. The eyes of their master are dark now, as he looks back up at Taekwoon; it makes Taekwoon anxious, because he knows there’s more.

“You won’t be leaving alone,” the master continues, and his fingers interlink in front of his chest -- Hakyeon tenses, and there’s a moment when Taekwoon’s heart soars at the thought of fighting next to Hakyeon again.

“You will be taking Sanghyuk with you.”

Taekwoon’s eyes widen in surprise, and shock, and he feels like his breath is knocked out from his lungs. Sanghyuk? But -- Sanghyuk is just a boy, just barely tapping into his skills as a healer -- surely this is a mistake--

“I’m sorry, sir, but we cannot take Sanghyuk there.” Hakyeon’s voice is trembling with restraint, and Taekwoon looks at his mate, feeling the appreciation seeping through his bones. He’s right. They can’t.

“He’s barely even grasping the arts of healing, and Taekwoon has been on mission too often to be able to build up his powers accordingly--”

Hakyeon stops at the look on their master’s face, feeling the authority he emanates making his mouth run dry. Taekwoon can feel the tension; you’re never supposed to second guess orders given to you. But still, bringing Sanghyuk is foolish. He wouldn’t be of any help, and would only get in Taekwoon’s way.

“I realize that you think he is not up for the task,” their master starts, and Hakyeon’s fingers tighten around Taekwoon’s, so much that he can feel the blood flow get interrupted. “But they did not request for him in terms of his healing ability.”

Taekwoon gasps at the words, and the premonition of something very bad is spreading through his limbs. 

“You don’t mean--” he starts, eyes wide and scared. He’s been working for a very long time to keep Sanghyuk from having to delve into his natural magic, going as far as to teach him healing. Thinking about somebody outside of the guild knowing about it scares him, but it unsettles him even more to think somebody would put Sanghyuk in such imminent danger -- to win a war.

“Telepaths are an asset in battle,” the master says with a defeated sigh.

“But-- he’s only a kid! He doesn’t have enough experience, doesn’t have enough energy to survive--” Taekwoon’s tone raises with each single one of his words, the shock of what he’s hearing too much to bear. Now it’s Hakyeon’s turn to squeeze his hand to calm him down, to remind him that it’s not his place. Ironic, Taekwoon thinks, coming from one of the least composed mages in the guild.

Taekwoon’s eyes bore into their master’s, defiance burning in his gaze. The tension feels like it’s amplifying in the room between them, and Taekwoon’s fingers prickle with the temptation to launch forward.

Their master breaks the silence after a moment, trying to gauge Taekwoon’s reaction. “He’s an adult, and old enough to be sent out on mission,” he starts, calmly. “Whatever boy you think he is, it’s not for you to decide on his missions. He’s a mage of the guild, and as much as anybody, he has a duty to fulfil.”

Taekwoon snorts. He knows Sanghyuk isn’t a boy, and he knows he has to start his missions soon enough. But… for his first one to be one of the most dangerous he’s ever going to have to face -- that’s something Taekwoon can’t just take quietly.

“Then let him fulfil his duty elsewhere. Let him have a chance to progress and embrace his powers before anything! Hell, the only thing the boy knows about them is terrifying to him! Why do you think I’ve been teaching him healing, instead of strengthening his telepathy?” Taekwoon tries to keep his voice even, serious, but he can feel the tornado of emotions whirl inside of him. He’s terrified of having to take Sanghyuk with him -- of what it means if he does.

“It’s already settled. You’re still under trainin yourself, and you can’t change the orders anymore, Taekwoon.” The master’s face looks exhausted in the dim light of the window shining through the dusty office room. Taekwoon can tell it’s not only him that the thought doesn’t please; and yet, he cannot understand the decision. 

He casts his eyes down, and Hakyeon’s hand on his grounds him enough to keep him standing.

“And Sanghyuk?” Taekwoon can hear Hakyeon ask. “Does he know yet?”

Their master’s voice sounds defeated as he answers, and Taekwoon remembers how much every one of the guild’s members is just as much family to him as they are to Taekwoon; despite that, the anger he feels doesn’t dissipate at the thought.

“I’ve talked to him already. He knows his role, and he agreed to it without any objections.”

“Of course he would,” Taekwoon mutters under his breath, and it earns him a nudge of Hakyeon’s elbow into his side.

“Understood. We will be taking our leave now, sir.” Hakyeon replies, bowing. He waits for Taekwoon to say his goodbyes as well, but Taekwoon turns on his heals without another look back.

“Oh, and Hakyeon?” their masters voice resonates behind them just as they open the door. “Take them to the settlement, safe of harm. Understood?”

Hakyeon’s grip on Taekwoon’s fingers tightens, and Taekwoon can hear the smile in his words when he replies. 

“Yes, sir.”

 

***

 

“Doesn’t it scare you?” Taekwoon asks hours later, deep in the night when he can’t sleep, the prospect of having to take Sanghyuk keeping him from rest.

For a moment, he doesn’t get an answer, Hakyeon keeping silent until the skin on Taekwoon’s arms seems to tingle with impatience.

“Of course I am scared.” The words are quiet, soft, as if Hakyeon can barely press them out. “But most of all, I am scared because I haven’t been sent to fight with you. You might have to… what if you have to use that?”

The words hit Taekwoon in surprise, because the thought of having to leave Hakyeon was something to utterly foreign to him. The drafting request only includes him and Sanghyuk -- Hakyeon was only to be their guide on the way. The idea unsettles him, but he’s also glad; glad that Hakyeon wouldn’t be in any way close to the dangers of war. Close to him, when he has to do the one thing he’s hoped he’d never have to, again.

“You shouldn’t be,” Taekwoon replies at last, his fingers tracing up Hakyeon’s arm. “I won’t use it unless there is no other way. And you’ll be safe here, and I won’t have to save you, too.”

Hakyeon’s eyebrows furrow, and Taekwoon can tell he’s upset. “I don’t care if I die,” he snorts, as if it isn’t in the least bit frightening. “I just-- can’t imagine being here, constantly scared if you and Sanghyuk will… ever make it back.”

Taekwoon doesn’t know how to answer; they’re both in the same spot, and yet, Taekwoon feels happier if he knows Hakyeon, at least, is safe.

“I already have to take one person I care about to the battlefield,” he whispers, heart clenching in his chest, “I can’t take you, too.”

Hakyeon looks at him, unbelieving. “You’re just going to leave me behind? After all we’ve been through?!” His voice grows louder, pierces through the darkness around them, and Taekwoon flinches at the underlying pain in Hakyeon’s tone.

“I-- I can’t have to see you die.”

Hakyeon’s eyes are on his, the turmoil in them reflecting perfectly in his expression. It pains Taekwoon to see it, see the one person that’s most important to him feel this way. But he also can’t have Hakyeon hurt, can’t have him leading a battle where he’d be one of the biggest targets of enemy attacks.

“If you stay with me, you’ll have to, one day, you know. If it’s sooner or later, it’s something you won’t get around of. But suit yourself. I’m going to bed.” 

Taekwoon watches Hakyeon drape the covers over himself, turning away to face the room, away from Taekwoon. It pains to see him upset, but Taekwoon knows that if he’d let him fight, the pain and fear would take over his entire being. 

So he lies down, without another word, watching Hakyeon’s back as he feels the exhaustion of the day and the upcoming events take over his body. It doesn’t take him long to feel the hands of sleep reaching over him, and with a final sigh, his fingers come up to curl themselves into the fabric of Hakyeon’s night shirt.

“It’s… not the same…” Hakyeon hears Taekwoon mumble as he tries to keep from wrapping him in his arms. He knows it’s not, but it doesn’t appease his anger -- he’s the only one having to deal with the fear of Taekwoon, and Sanghyuk, never returning. He’s the only one having to cope with the thought that, maybe… he’s going to lose everything. And he can’t do anything about it.

 

***

 

On the other side of the city, Sanghyuk is sitting alone in his little room, looking at his surroundings like he’s trying to brand them into his memory. Ever since he saw the anger and desperation in both Hakyeon and Taekwoon’s eyes as they were walking down from the master’s office, there had been an unsettling storm raging in his chest -- and he knows it’s because of their mission, because the weight of the words and their meaning, and the emotions on their faces didn’t let him go, even after he was sent home to rest for the day.

He thought it was clear that they had to do anything to help, but he could sense the tenseness in both of his mentors, of his friends, as they walked by without noticing him. There was something about it that made Sanghyuk almost upset -- they had done enough missions to know their duties, and yet, the light in Hakyeon’s eyes had been disapproving. 

He sighs, ruffling his hair in an attempt to distract himself from all the thoughts bustling through his brain. He’s scared, Sanghyuk knows he is. 

He looks down at his fingers, thinks about how it felt to be in somebody’s own mind, to feel their emotions and their thoughts and completely overtaking their control. It’s both terrifying and invigorating, and that’s what scares Sanghyuk the most. But he knows his magic is strong, strong enough to have the power to change the war -- he doesn’t like boasting, but he can tell from the way people treat him when they find out.

Not Taekwoon, though; Taekwoon had always been different. He had looked worried, and Sanghyuk felt like he hadn’t needed to say another word to explain. Taekwoon had taken him in, shown him how to channel his magic into something good, something that made Sanghyuk feel like he could live with his powers. He doesn’t quite know when, but it had made him fall, too. Fall for Taekwoon, and eventually, after weeks and weeks of both of his mentors being inseperable, fall for Hakyeon, too.

It’s something Sanghyuk almost feels ashamed about -- falling for both his mentor and his boyfriend. It’s a silly crush, one that only shows how young he still is, and sometimes, Sanghyuk hates himself for it. He knows there is no way it could work, knows the two of them have a bond that he can’t get included in; and yet, the hope and fast beating of his heart each time they look at him, take care of him and tease him, is something Sanghyuk is afraid of ever loosing. 

He moves from his desk to sit on the side of his bed, his mind swirling around the mission and where it will bring him. Sanghyuk doesn’t feel fear yet, but he knows that the experience he will have on the battlefield-- that’s something to be terrified of. He tries not to think about it, tries to keep his mind busy with strengthening his magic and revelling in it; it’s something that’s always helped, tapping into his magical energy and feeling at peace with it.

He doesn’t know if he’s going to be able to sleep, even if the tornado of thoughts and emotions settles down inside of him.

 

***

 

The atmosphere is tense when Sanghyuk arrives at the outer ramparts of the city. Hakyeon and Taekwoon are already waiting for him, and Sanghyuk can tell that they had a fight -- Hakyeon's back is turned to face the younger, and Taekwoon's eyes are distant when their gazes meet, as if he’s far away in the hills he’s been looking at already.

"Morning," Sanghyuk greets, mostly to get rid of the awkwardness of walking into a tense situation. Hakyeon's eyes are softer than he expected them to be when the elemental mage turns to face him, but there's a glint of despair in their depths that Sanghyuk doesn't feel comfortable seeing. 

"You're here. Good." Hakyeon says with a small smile, but it's clear that he doesn't feel like smiling in the least bit; his eyes are distant and untouched. "We should get going. No point in lingering, it's going to be a two week journey until we reach the encampment."

Neither of them specifies which encampment they're meant to reach, and the idea of having to join war is something Sanghyuk still doesn't quite get his head around. But his resolve doesn't waver, and he gives Hakyeon a determined nod followed by a grin. It only makes the thin line of the mage’s lips even thinner. Sanghyuk can feel the weight of his backpack on his shoulders, can feel the straps sinking into his skin with the amount of things they had to take. Before he knows it, Hakyeon starts walking down the winding road, leading over the plains and into a distant mount of trees. He doesn’t once look back at the city walls.

 

***

 

“Hey, Taekwoon?” Sanghyuk starts after a couple of minutes of them walking, the city fading in the distance behind them.

The healer gives him a little grunt in response, indicating that he’s listening, and Sanghyuk worries his lip between his teeth.

“How bad is the situation at the front?”

Sanghyuk’s eyes meet Taekwoon’s as he speaks the words, and the elder’s gaze is filled with uncertainty. He can feel Hakyeon’s eyes on them, tense and sharp, and he almost wishes Sanghyuk didn’t ask.

“It’s…” Taekwoon starts, unsure how to reply. It’s very bad, is what he wants to say, but he also doesn’t want to rid Sanghyuk of the hope every person has, no matter what battle they’re going into. He settles for a compromising answers, though, not bearing to tell Sanghyuk about all the bad news they’ve heard from the messengers Lightning Floralis had sent in a request for help.

“The enemy forces have a lot of mercenary mages at their disposal. How they got so many is a big question -- it makes the fight harder. For now, our fronts have been able to fight steadily... But what we will find when we get to the battlefield, I don’t know.”

The reply gives Sanghyuk something to ponder over for a while, and they make their way forward in silence. Taekwoon’s eyes meet Hakyeon’s once more, and the lack of words between them is of no matter; Taekwoon understands the thoughts Hakyeon doesn’t speak out loud. He tries for a little, tiny smile, reassuring and warm, and for a moment, it seems the elemental mage is appeased -- but Taekwoon doesn’t see the fist Hakyeon’s fingers cramp  
into at his side.

 

***

 

By the time they reach the growing shadow of edge of the forest their eyes had seen from the city ramparts, the sun is already sinking low between its leaves, basking the sky and the tips of the trees in warm, heavy colors. 

Sanghyuk feels exhausted, his feet hurting as he helps the others set up a little camp for the night. They haven’t eaten much over the course of the day, and the younger can feel his stomach churn in demand.

“I’ll fix you something quick, okay?” Hakyeon says softly, and it’s the first time that day that Sanghyuk notices a small smile playing about his lips. It’s taking him off guard, and he can’t help the dust of a blush spreading over his cheeks at Hakyeon’s attentiveness; he nods, and with the flick of his fingers Hakyeon has already started a little fire in front of their tent. 

“Tomorrow we’ll rise early, before sunrise, that way we should be able to get a good portion of the way done before we reach town,” Taekwoon announces, and Hakyeon nods in agreement, eyes still fixated on the pot sitting on the fire. Sanghyuk can now smell the scent of spices and meat boiling in a bit of soup, and to his starved body, nothing has ever smelled more delicious.

They gulp down the food in a matter of minutes, all of them hungry from the long day of travel. Sanghyuk can tell that the exhaustion has appeased whatever quarrel lay between his mentors, and their conversation is specific, but light. They intentionally do not touch the subject of the battle and the war, and Sanghyuk feels somewhat grateful he doesn’t have to listen to it.

The sun has long since set, and the chill of the night’s breeze within the trees makes Sanghyuk shiver. Taekwoon notices, and with a little nod of the head to Hakyeon, the elemental mage makes the flames of the fire dance higher, illuminating their little camp. 

Sanghyuk marvels at the prickling flames, the way they move between themselves; they’re not too hot, despite their size, and Sanghyuk suspects Hakyeon is controlling their heat. His eyes wander to the older mage, his slanted eyes lost in his fire, one of his hands dangling from his knees. Sanghyuk watches the little flames tangle themselves around his hand, and he’s almost envious about the beauty of it all, of Hakyeon’s magic. He thinks bitterly about his own, intrusive strength, and and the feeling like he could never be on par with any of his companions settles in his stomach -- lightly, but a nagging, constant awareness.

“Let’s go to bed,” Hakyeon says softly after another couple of minutes, and within the blink of an eye the fire is extinguished, not even one little veil of smoke rising up over the top of the trees and into the night’s sky.

 

***

 

It takes them about four days to get to the next bigger town, even though Hakyeon announces they’ll make camp in a little meadow just a couple of steps away from the edge of the forest.

“We won’t make it to the town tonight,” he says matter-of-factly, and the eyes of the other two look longingly into the distance, contemplating the far off lights behind the ramparts, projecting warmth. “We’ll need another two hours, three maybe, and the moon is already high. We need rest.”

Even though Sanghyuk longs for a good stew and a soft bed to sleep in, he also knows that Hakyeon is right. There is no use in arguing -- the tent is already set.

They each take a couple of bites from the bread they kept for the travel, the loaf almost completely dry and hard under their teeth. The salted meat is chewy, but it’s enough to keep them from travelling hungry. 

Taekwoon’s eyes are somewhere far off, and his thoughts swirl around what’s to come; he isn’t sure if he’s going to be able to survive. It’s weird, being a healer and feeling so powerless about war -- it’s nothing Taekwoon can compare to the numerous missions they’ve been sent on. Those are different, he thinks. Those were all under control, within their powers. War, though, was a completely different battle.

If worst comes to worst, he might have to-- but it’s something Taekwoon doesn’t even want to formulate in his mind. The thought about that magic terrifies him, and he hopes that where he goes, nobody in a higher position knows about it. He wouldn’t be able to act by those orders, not even if it cost him his life.

Lost in his own thoughts and world, Taekwoon doesn't notice the growing agitation raging inside of his lover; only Sanghyuk notices the frown on his forehead, and he starts to be entirely worried when Hakyeon’s flames start to rise, higher and higher between them.

“What's-- are you… are you okay?” Sanghyuk starts, unsure what to do. Hakyeon's eyes blaze up at him, and the intensity of the state makes Sanghyuk swallow. 

“You are going to war, Sanghyuk. You're both going to be in the center of battle, and Lord knows if you'll return! How can I be okay?” There's desperation meddled within Hakyeon's tone that has Sanghyuk’s mouth run dry. 

Hakyeon's words bring Taekwoon back to reality, and Sanghyuk looks at him like a deer in headlights. Taekwoon’s brows furrow, and Sanghyuk can tell that this is not the first time the topic had come up between his two mentors.

“I told you I'm not going to let you stay.”

Taekwoon’s words cut the air around them like knives, and it's the first time Sanghyuk has heard his voice turn defiant, almost cold. It makes Hakyeon flinch, and the silent exchange between them terrifies Sanghyuk even more. 

“You can't tell me what to do.” Hakyeon bites back, and his eyes are burning with an anger that makes Sanghyuk want to run. “I'm not letting you two die.”

This time, it's Sanghyuk's eyebrows that draw in together in irritation. He doesn't understand Hakyeon's arguments -- they've been given orders, and they will need to follow them. 

“We won't turn away from battle.” Sanghyuk says into their quarrel, voice hard and determined. There's a challenging look in his eyes that's directed at Hakyeon, and he can tell that it takes the elder off guard. “You won't make me.”

For a moment Hakyeon is stunned silent, looking at Sanghyuk with incredulity. Sanghyuk had teased him, called him, whined and even screamed at him before; but this unrelenting tone is something different. 

“I'm not-- I'm not telling you anything,” Hakyeon presses out through his lips, and Sanghyuk can see the anger returning. He can feel the air turn hotter around them, and with a worried glance at Taekwoon, he knows it's Hakyeon's emotions running wild -- and with them, his magic.

“I can't-- I can't stay behind and wait for you to maybe never return!” Hakyeon's voice is trembling, and there is tension in the air that tells Sanghyuk that this might escalate any moment. He looks at Taekwoon for help, but the healer’s eyes are adamant, hard as stone.

“I can't see you die, Hakyeon. I can't… see you go down and maybe come too late, I just can't do this.”

And then it hits Sanghyuk -- how he's misunderstood the situation, the emotions at stake, the intentions behind Hakyeon's reluctance to bring them to the war front. He feels childish, stupid to have doubted, and he can understand the emotions now raging inside the elemental mage.

But his realization comes too late. Hakyeon's fists are tight at his sides, and the look of utter frustration in his eyes as he looks at Taekwoon doesn't bode well.

“Well, then maybe we should end this here. Nothing for you to worry about when you have no more reason to.” The words come out cold and sharp, and they hit Taekwoon with the full intensity of an icy blizzard. His lower lip quivers, but he holds Hakyeon's gaze, determined not to stand down. 

Before Sanghyuk can say something, anything, Hakyeon turns on his heels and walks into the dark shapes of the trees. He doesn't turn to look back, and the two of them watch his retreating back, feeling their stomachs sinking. 

Silence reigns between them for a few moments; Sanghyuk doesn't know what to say. It is the first time he's witnessed any sort of fight between Taekwoon and Hakyeon, and to be fair, he's not quite sure how to handle it. 

“...He’s going to come back, don't worry.” He tries after a couple of minutes, giving Taekwoon a reassuring smile. “He's too passionate about you, that's all. He doesn't know how to keep his emotions in check, especially with his magical power as tangible and fragile as it is.”

Taekwoon doesn't quite know what to reply, contemplating Sanghyuk with a heavy gaze. The boy had grown so much while he had been out on missions, and that only made Taekwoon's feelings for him even more confusing. Sanghyuk talking like an adult is something he needs to get accustomed to, but it also soothes the pain the fight had brought, if only a little.

Taekwoon can't help but smile at Sanghyuk's hopeful words, and he feels the appreciation for his student grow in his chest.

“It's not only about me, you know?” he chuckles a little, even though it sounds slightly reluctant. “Those words were directed at you, too.”

Taekwoon's words make a little blush form on Sanghyuk's cheeks, and he can't help but feel a little shy. He feels warm thinking about Hakyeon caring that much for him, but at the same time, he hopes Taekwoon does, too. 

“Let's get some rest. I'll talk with Hakyeon when he comes back…” Taekwoon sighs, and despite the mood being in balance once again, Sanghyuk can clearly feel the anxiety about losing Hakyeon emanating off of Taekwoon. He can only relate a little, but even that's enough to understand the downright horrifying thought of losing someone you love. He doesn't even want to think about it. 

 

***

 

It feels like barely an hour later when Taekwoon is woken up by loud, rustling sounds outside of the tent. His eyes, still heavy with sleep, flicker over to Sanghyuk lying curled up next to him -- Hakyeon is nowhere in sight.

He hears hushed voices from outside, and they sound rough; he can vaguely make out lights flickering through the tent’s cloth, moving around them in a circle. Taekwoon’s hands come up to shake Sanghyuk awake by the shoulder, and the younger takes a moment blinking his eyes to catch onto the situation.

“What’s going on?” he whispers, eyes darting at the lights outside, worried. Taekwoon doesn’t say anything, just motions him to stay quiet as he makes for the entrance of the tent. His fingers brush it open, and he can see a couple of men walking around with torches, whispering as if setting up a scheme. Their clothes look thick and rustled, and some of them have clubs and other weaponry in their hands.

“Shit,” Taekwoon breathes, and Sanghyuk is behind him in a matter of seconds, eyes scanning what he sees.

“Bandits?” Sanghyuk ventures softly, and Taekwoon grits his teeth. This isn’t good. He keeps his eyes out for Hakyeon, but the elemental mage is nowhere in sight. A sinking feeling spreads over Taekwoon; despite them knowing hand to hand combat fairly decently, if there is a mage with them, they will be overpowered quickly. Even if Sanghyuk would use his telepathic powers, there is no way that he could control an entire horde of enemies.

Taekwoon weighs their chances to get out unnoticed; he counts about twelve bandits surrounding their camp, and the probability of them going unseen is very low. If only Hakyeon hadn’t walked off, they might’ve been able to push thr--

“They’re awake! TAKE THEM! NOW!”

The unexpected yell makes Taekwoon and Sanghyuk freeze in their spot for a moment. Taekwoon curses under his breath; of course they would get discovered. He gives Sanghyuk a look before he takes his wrist, bolting up and pulling Sanghyuk with him just in time to evade one of the clubs aiming for their heads.

“Where’s Hakyeon??” Sanghyuk calls as Taekwoon tries to pull him through the enemies, quickly stepping left and right out of the way of one knife or another club. Taekwoon doesn’t answer him, instead stopping when a wall of bandits try to corner them, keeping them from running away; Taekwoon’s eyes flicker through their ranks, looking for a gap.

There’s a thump behind him, and the sound makes Taekwoon whirl around -- only to see Sanghyuk guarding himself with his arm, the spikes adorning the wooden club slashing through his leather attire. Taekwoon sees blood flowing from the wounds opening on Sanghyuk’s forearm, but before he can react, he hears the cries behind him.

He turns around just as one of the bandits is swinging his sword at him, and he can evade the blade by mere inches. But just as me makes to engage one enemy, two others launch their attack, and Taekwoon is forced to back off again, unable to land even one hit. He curses, eyes trying to turn to Sanghyuk to see how he’s doing -- just when one of the blades grazes his left shoulder.

He cries out in pain, and for a moment he sees red. The wound isn’t deep enough to be dangerous, but he can’t fight with it; and it’s right at that moment that Taekwoon wishes his powers were of offensive nature. The thought makes him stop for a brief moment, contemplating their position and his choices -- he can hear Sanghyuk struggling behind him, can hear one or two bandits cry out in pain as Sanghyuk tries to twist their minds into submission -- and the thought of not being able to shield Sanghyuk from pain pushes Taekwoon over the edge.

He grits his teeth, one knee on the ground, his injured arm hanging from his side; and then he taps into his magic. He’s buried it for years now, the part of his magic that always contradicted everything he’s lived for, everything his healing was, and the simple thought of tapping into that abyss of darkness freezes his limbs. But he pushes through, the sounds of Sanghyuk struggling behind him fueling his resolve -- he knows he is going to regret it when everything is over, but it’s not the time to think about guilt. Taekwoon needs to keep them alive.

He can feel the energy surge through his veins, can feel the life power of all living creatures in his close vicinity in the palm of his hands. Some are small, others, human. It doesn’t take him long to single out the ones he needs to target, only milliseconds -- and with a twist of his right arm, a flick of his fingers, Taekwoon starts.

The feeling makes him shake, eyes wide open in horror and face white as the moon. He can feel the energy leaving their enemies, can feel it fill his body like a parasite -- growing with each second, being sucked into him. It makes him want to throw up, draining a human being’s life force with his mere hands, without them even standing a chance; he hates it. He wishes it to be over, but Taekwoon has never drained so many at once, and he can feel his own magical energy deplete as his life force grows. It’s sickening.

But suddenly, even without his magic taking over, he can feel their energies go out, like candles in a sharp breeze. He feels the sudden cut of the ties between him and his enemies, feels the release -- his hands are shaking, and he can’t stand on his legs, his muscles too wobbly to hold ground.

“Taekwoon! Sanghyuk!”

It’s Hakyeon’s voice that fills his ears, and for a moment, Taekwoon can’t believe how glad he is to hear it. He can feel hands coming to rest on his shoulders, shaking him, but the feeling of the lives he almost took still lingers in every vein in his body. Taekwoon feels dizzy, keeping himself up with one of his hands on the ground, but it doesn’t steady him.

Instead of lifting his eyes to meet the worried ones of Hakyeon, they fall closed, and his consciousness sinks into darkness.

**Author's Note:**

> hi! thanks for reading, everyone!  
> I'm sorry I had to end it on a cliff hanger, but as I was writing the end, I realized that it didn't quite fit... so I'm gonna have to write a second chapter some time in the future. I know how the story needs to plan out, so it won't take forever, but sadly not within the deadline of this challenge ;;;  
> I hope you enjoyed it so far!! thank you!


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